It’s only a necklace.
It shouldn’t mean much at all,
yet it holds everything I can never have,
it’s all I can do not to fall.
I’m gripping onto the shadows—
to the person he left behind.
Trying to remember his voice, his smile,
to make a picture inside my mind.
Is it strange to hate someone you never knew,
yet love them all the same?
I cannot tell if this is the truth,
or if my head is playing games.
The photographs of his kids and loving wife
make me wonder if he was ever there at all,
or if he was just a ghost of self-made fiction—
the unknown will become my downfall.
The truth is, he has so many others now.
A family to call home.
So why can’t I just let it go,
and go back to my own?
It’s just one silly gift.
It shouldn’t mean so much to me.
But without remembering who I was,
how do I know who I’m supposed to be?
Was I not good enough?