I keep telling myself that
I'm not hiding the past
I don't even know if I'm lying to myself anymore
why is it so scary to tell someone that i was once
a girl?
I still freeze in the men's bathroom
I'm trying to tell myself I'm not a fraud
Internalized transphobia slows down the movement
how can I be proud and
so scared?
I feel like I must hate my body more
I need to not like it to justify
my identity
and my world
But I don't my body feels to delicate to hate
even if it isn't mine i don't want to make it
cry?
My body has scars that will never go away
I have a chest that is not so comfortable for a boy
Why is it so hard to say I'm trans?
I'm proud of who i am
I swear I'm not hiding
the past?
This was harder to write