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\n \n \n \n Sydney Bittner\n \n \n \n \n Aug 2019\n \n \n \n
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\n A galaxy's frontal lobe\n
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\n At your most vulnerable-
With your shield down, your lights off.
Your eyes warm, comfortable-
The universe speaks to me.

You are a collection of
life's loving, sharpest lessons.
You are all those sensations
Represented by moments;

Soft voice in a midnight tent
On an august's dewy night.
Skinned knee on the hot gravel
And a mother's tender kiss.

We're everything and nothing-
Time tears all matter apart.
But I think your stardust
was born on the meteor next to mine.
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\n \n \n \n Sydney Bittner\n \n \n \n \n Jul 2019\n \n \n \n
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\n Crescendo II\n
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\n Glamorous indie rock and roll
Switches station to become R&B favourites
And in part I'm forgetting the wombats
And fall out boy
And the 1975
So I can close my eyes
Against the city skyline
Because I see your frame
In every flashing light

I believe in unfamiliar words.
I let the beat convince me-
It is not jarring to be alone.

But I'm missing the beauty of lyrics
Did I abandon the meaning
For the sound?
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\n \n #breakup\n \n
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\n \n \n \n Sydney Bittner\n \n \n \n \n Jul 2019\n \n \n \n
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\n Crescendo I\n
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\n There is that sourness in the form of a word
Displacement of all efforts
When you look into the blanket folds
And readjust to privacy

Who am I when I'm not tucked
into your shoulder blades?
What is mischief if you're not laughing?
And tenderness too-

For that I always looked to you
And i still do
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\n \n \n \n Sydney Bittner\n \n \n \n \n Jul 2019\n \n \n \n
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\n 4:23 AM. Loving Someone// The 1975\n
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\n The most gorgeous purple glow
To ever dare cut a line through my lungs.
My skin warm and red, itching,
Sun burned
Under the wash of
Your guilt-sick gaze.

To know that I soaked
In all that UV ray damage
Only to find
That when you slide beneath the horizon
You had wished all day
That it would rain.

That is the worst nightmare.
5AM leaves me wired.
I wait for you in my dreams.
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\n \n #unrequited\n \n
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\n \n \n \n Sydney Bittner\n \n \n \n \n Jun 2019\n \n \n \n
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\n Only fools fall\n
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\n We wait for the excuse of liquid courage.
Pretend your lips on my pulse
don't feel better
than the blood pumping through.

In the dark I can almost taste-
the way our energy jumps
from palm to palm.
The way the sun's Ray's line
my questioning mind.

In the black of 3am,
your hand finds my thigh
and the ceiling above us
is washed in oranges and pinks.

I'm always, always thinking-
at least vaguely-

Do you see it? Do you see it?

How the words silhouette in mauve
across my laughter.
Collapse in periwinkle
Under your lashes.

Do you see it? Do you see it?

All that color-
Flowering in the shadows.

5am. The birds chirp
in cerulean blues.
But your car is grey,
And you're putting on your shoes.
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\n \n #unrequited\n \n #love\n \n
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\n \n \n \n Sydney Bittner\n \n \n \n \n May 2019\n \n \n \n
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\n Libra moon\n
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\n In your car at midnight
I swear to the god I don't believe in
I saw the world turn in your eyes.

What do you want?

The tilt of your chin
At the mention of Karl Marx.
Even in fluorescent lighting
Tu es un boule de feu.

What do you want?

The sound of your laugh across the line
Even on the longest shift of my life-
Tu me rends heureux.

What do you want?

You were so right.
Between Freud's dreams
And Sylvia Plath's misery-
The good must always come
Weighed down.

While you were washed over
With mercy's tropical sun
Cutting all those strings
I was realizing
What I want.
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\n \n \n \n Sydney Bittner\n \n \n \n \n Apr 2019\n \n \n \n
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\n Water signs under the influence\n
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\n I found you in the shadows of that smoke stained room.
Your hair was blue then, what a shock
against the grey of lakeshore avenue.
You were the vision of a sparrow's wing
Unhindered by the choking fumes.

You find me today, sun beams flaring out from a cruel arched brow.
What a picture i must have made then
In comparison to now.

Somewhere along the way our softness seemed to delegate itself,
job rotation of the pessimistic.
I still imagine the way naivity tasted on your lips-

Chocolate dipped dreams. I could hear your voice for hours on end,
And still call you again at 3am.
Now every tone is under the line
of a jaded cat's whiskers.

I am impassioned, every word
Enflates my spirit until
It is too big. You are taking
Out that thin steel pin
And looking for the best spot

You want to let that heavy sadness in.
I know it well, I remember the
Way it felt to love her. So warm,
but now the new day calls-

And you are clicking closed the shutters
While i am throwing on my runners.

If you won't come with me I'll go alone

You turn out the light
You say \"go\"
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