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Wry is one of many things you do well....
~~~~~~
dedicated to, inspired by Paul Anthony Hutchinson, who wrote those words to me but two hours ago

Wry
- produced by a distortion or lopsidedness of the ****** features: a wry grin.
- abnormally bent or turned to one side; twisted; crooked: a wry mouth.
- devious in course or purpose; misdirected.
- contrary; perverse.
- distorted or perverted, as in meaning.
- bitterly or disdainfully ironic or amusing: a wry remark.


It is bitter,
It is amusing,
the distorting that gives a shape and thereby
meaning
to a misdirected life,
the ****** muscles perused,
all reversed, all per-versed

t'is not just the smile that is loopy,
or simplistically turned upside down,
twisted but not dubious, nor devious,
twisted but straight, I say,
wry is not a seething something I do well,
wry is in every nuclei I ever split,
every line etch-a-sketched in every poem
worn down,
physically inscribed on my face.

so much to reveal,
but not here not now not,
ever on and ever in, explicit
but blurred, burred, and buried
within them is the ironic of a man
that laughed through the better part of his life,
for in that period, there was no
better,
just worse

I was born wry.
the last of three, I was nameless till I was twenty one,
they called me just
brother, or the brother.

at twenty five, I married the wrong woman,
though we both wanted not too,
thirty five years of wry, the lawyers rejoiced,
the judges celebrated, the poets went mad,
swear it true,
the family counselors said
beyond hopeless,

and with wry smiles at the spectacle of years wasted,
spent like there was no tomorrow,
for there was none
in the titanic disaster of more, new lives corrupted

I lived life wry.

now, in the final fourth quaternary,
see how he,
the master of the unceremonious,
in on bent knee, hands clasped, on bed, rested,
when he seeks comfort and guidance for the upcoming
finality following a two minute warning,
warning that even now,
the future wry, turned to one side, when all he wanted,
was to live quiet in the straight and narrow
and not write poems asking himself with trepidation,
from where will come the courage to make this
last passage....

oh yes, I do wry so well,
and all things that wryhme with hell,
you will be spared,
for wryly he exclaims
"Enough, enough"

wry why!
for in all the days of his disheveled life,
there have been but a few,
when it has been simply,
enough
Today seems like good day for death
Seems like a good day to take my last step, last breath
So why don't you **** me?
Put a gun to my head
It'll make me smile
It'll thrill me
I'm no selfish being,
I can't **** myself
But I've got the gun and it's loaded
All I need is a little help
Ease my pain, but first crank it up
Torture me with the pain I've caused
Until I've had enough
Put me through hell
And then take my life
I promise I'll be alright
It'll make things better
Once I see the light...
I feel like an alien
Like I am on a planet that isn’t mine
And it is crawling with these disgusting creatures
That look exactly like me
And I will never escape
how a person's
perceptions can alter
and see another
in a different light
a perspective unclouded
is one of truth
being situated
in a brighter surround
shows the other person
to be ever so fake
a plastic imitation
not the genuine article
is she
no not at all
hindsight has shed
a fresh perspective
the microscope
detailed
what she was like
many moons ago
her sham line
got swallowed
without question
but to-day
her fraudulent persona
is well illuminated
caramel oozing from the center
caressing the taste buds
crunchy honey comb
creating a whole of mouth sweetness
creamy peppermints lingering
cosseting divinely on the tongue
chocolates bring the oral orifice such pleasure
I closed my eyes
  And watched your face become the black
      That my eyes see.
It's better this way.
I'm better off as a
spectator to the
way everyone
else finds happiness.

They dress their
best and pray on
sundays.
I drink in stale
clothes and laugh
out loud in the
open park in
the dead of night.
High and at one
with the
thieving masked  
lords of the night.

Theirs are goals
and mine are troubling
questions that cause them
discomfort.
I try to pull on
the  answers
no one wants
to really
hear,
not even
myself.

They all long for
love and praise.
Heart shaped
chocolate filled
boxes is what
represents their
artificial idea
of love.

I touch not on
this subject.

I chase away my madness
while drunk and too
high to keep up with
my own shadow.

You'll find me in
the darkness if I let
you.

I'll have the pistol in
my pocket, a bottle
in my hand
and this dead
end love on
the mind.
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