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While you waited for the future you forgot about today
And the sand kept on pouring.
And time slipped away.
 May 2014 Jo
Jason Cirkovic
Dear America,

I will like to thank you for a couple of things
that i have noticed for a couple of years

Thanks for destroying humanity
I really want my kids to know that panda bears are from Chinese restaurants
and that Taco Bell originated from Mexico
all Asians know how to handle a Rubik's cube
like the curves on a women.

Thanks for posting these skeletons in magazines that we call models and telling everybody that this what beauty is, so girls can put your fingers down their throats
and guys can juice themselves up
because lets be honest personality doesn't matter, right?

thanks for killing creativity with your genocide
and lynching our education system
because our minds are the like the assembly lines for your standardized testing
if you don’t fill out the right bubbles that means that you are not smart like the rest of us
you see we are robots
if you don't fill out that bubble that you were not programed like rest of us
fill in out that bubble because
that bubble is going to determine if you go to a good college or not.
and remember community college means you are a failure.

Thanks for destroying our free time
Instead of stopping and smelling the roses we stop and take a photos for instagram
instead of going out and meeting new people,
we flash around our privates on the internet like it’s public property
because **** the love I want to get naked right?
because she only needs to loved for that one night?

We don’t have free time because we have to work on
Our Grades
Our Sports
Doing community service
So we can have these perfect resumes
and go to that perfect school
so you can go to that perfect job
and get married to that perfect love of our lives
and have three perfect kids
Retire and wait until your body decays into the earth
at that perfect timing

but wait life isn't perfect right?

Sincerely,
Voiceless Stranger
 May 2014 Jo
Jason Cirkovic
I'm Done
 May 2014 Jo
Jason Cirkovic
What do you mean when you say you want another chance?
another chance, to hold me by your puppet strings,
to yank my heart and put it on another roller coaster
and make it go through these turns all over again.

you know what
I'm done

I'm done with you taking me for granted
I'm done with with this roller coaster going around and around  
like how you go around in my mind
while you sit there and watch me in pain
I'm done with your game of
these ******* strings pulling me around called love
I'm done with your lies

you don't love me
you just love the idea of me
you love that man that cares about you
you love that man to chase you around and around
a man to sit on that roller coaster that you oh so love
You love a man who you can wake up to every morning

but you don’t love me back
you don't want to go through that roller coaster
round and around like our augments we have on a daily bases
Oh wait, now I'm special to you?
All I felt was this : helplessness
helpless like those sleepless nights that you made me go through
making me hear the ticks from the clock by my bed side
I was sentenced to stare at my ceiling.
because I couldn't stare your eyes that are oh so capable of holding lies
but now I'm done
I'm breaking out of these chains and my sentence is served.
 May 2014 Jo
Jason Cirkovic
My mother should be an author
She carves her soul into millions of pieces
Leaving it behind all of the family photos
When I see my mother
I see a woman
Who wants to hide her soul in a needle
Just so the screaming can stop in her mind,
These bottles are rattling in the living room
You see they have put shackles on her heart,
She can't love anymore
Without having ***** in her water bottle.

Where is she hiding her beer?
I feel like my mother is giving me a scavenger hunt
From the shards of glass that were left on the baseball fields
My mother used to take me to.

You know she always wasn't like this
She was strong minded and had a big heart
Tonight I will tell you the story of a woman
Who lost her soul to the Keystones to the Miller Lites
To the ****** Mary’s.
Let's rewind time
See ******* the soul in ten years

10- I look into my mother's eyes and I start to cry
Because I'm looking at a woman who I don't know anymore

9- I refused to bail her out of jail again
Because I'm afraid her kidney will fail if she drinks again

8- My mother staggered into the theater and disrupted the whole play,
My cast mates turned to me and asked, isn't that your mother?

7- I had to hold my mothers hand
Because she was throwing up the cocktail of drugs and alcohol

6- Daddy had to get mom out of jail she was drinking again

5- My mother throws the bottle across the room
And told me the reason why she drinks is because I'm Autistic

4- My mother overslept for my piano recital,
I didn't think it was a big deal
But I remember she spent the whole night crying
With a wine glass in her hand.

3- Mommy I didn't know your prescription came in a needle

2- Mommy the prescription say 2 pills a day
why are you taking 6?

1- My mother went to the doctor
Found out that she has Rheumatoid Arthritis
I don't know what that means,
But I know she will still be strong right?

0- She took me to a Dodger game for my birthday.
I remember Sammy Sosa hitting a home run that game
She told me that the only person that can **** your soul is yourself
 Apr 2014 Jo
r
Black Lipstick
 Apr 2014 Jo
r
She hides her smile
behind black lipstick.
Her voice is low
and in between.
She smells of loneliness
and cigarettes.
She sings for me
when she is high.

She gets me higher
than I can go.
She takes me low
and in between.
Her heart's on fire
when she sings.
Her voice is smokey,
full of pain.

She sings of loneliness
and broken dreams.
Her dance is low
and in between.
She gets me high
and lets me down.
She kisses me
with black lipstick.

r ~ 4/29/14
\•/\  
   |        
  /\
 Apr 2014 Jo
r
I could write a poem about myself.
I could write a poem.
I could write.
I could.
I.

r ~ 4/28/14
\•/\
   |
  / \
i speak out to those who feel what i feel

i speak for the quiet ones,
those that feel alone and scared and want to fall into space

i speak for the hopeless lovers, left alone in hotel rooms
to cry on the cold tile floor

i speak out for the people that i know cannot
speak out anymore, their voice box broken amongst the shatters of their heart

i speak out for the failures, for the ones who feel a blow
from their mind when they disappoint someone else yet again

i speak out for the ones that cannot let go of
memories that intertwine every delicate vein in their chests

and i speak out for the lost lovers so buried under
burdens that they are left to scurry for their own form of substance in the empty room around them

i speak out for all of them and those in between--the silent ones, the ones whose
words have never been quieter and minds have never been louder
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