Stacy Mills

Stacy Mills Jun 2016

Untitled

I am stuck living in the past tonight.
Trying to sleep with no prevail.
Constant thoughts of the one that is lost.
A reminder of all the ways,
the ways that I have failed.
Try to let go and ease the ache that eats away my soul.
I am broken now and realize that this pain may never go.
So I swallow hard and try to smile to hide the way I feel.
Deep inside,
I know this lie will keep me from moving on.
Alone in life,
as the same in death is how I will remain.
My hope is gone as I am bound,
to the Devil's gate.
This thought is held as I go off,
to take in my last breath.
To be at peace,
this shall never be,
actions with no refrain.
As I pass,
a picture remains,
of a tender smile.
My eyes turn gray as I fade away without you by my side.

Not written by me

Stacy Mills Jun 2016

One day my love

I long for the day when I can touch your hand
I yearn for the day when that close we stand
I want to look in your eyes and see your soul
I want you to hold my heart and see what you stole
to sit on the couch and watch some TV show
and not have to talk because we would just know
not that the feelings would ever go unsaid
to finally have this hunger fed
to have between us a .001 space
but we're grown people and know that life is not a race
we both concur completely agree
that will be together when it's meant to be

Stacy Mills May 2016

Hopeless

I will always be alone
A sad little drone
having all my wants and needs unfulfilled
hoping good values in my children I have instilled
but this all feels hopeless and helpless and without an end
I wish this path toward the bottom would some how Bend
make a U-turn and head toward the top
causing all this pain and depression to stop
but I've no hope that any of this will be
because somehow I cannot let this sadness free

Stacy Mills May 2016

Lost

My best friend just walked out the door
and I'm afraid I won't see her anymore
I love her so much she so important to me
but she is dabbling in drugs you see
not just *** the simple easy kind
but with **** and that ***** with your mind
I've seen people fall down this path before
and they think they'll be get clean but that's really a lore
don't know what to do and I don't know what to say
but she just turned and walked away
said I love you and promise I'll see you again
but I know deep down that that was the end
my best friend just walked out the door
and I'm afraid I won't see her anymore

Stacy Mills May 2016

Memories from grade school

I used to dream I woke up , got dressed, went to school, then I'd wake up n do it again, only to wake up and do it again, only to really wake up n not want to do it again. Needless to say I tended to miss the bus alot!

Stacy Mills Apr 2016

Does my being here hurt you? In any way? Do you resent me for my inability to be inlove?

See, I want to leave this town as there is nothing for me here. You don't want to leave because you have everything here. I don't want to leave you as you are my best friend. But I wonder if be being here is hurting more than leaving would? I live with you because you are my best friend and I love you and we get along better than anyone. Does it hurt to have me live with you but not be with you? Would it hurt you less to have me gone? Is me being here somehow creating a means to the end of our friendship deep seeded from a resentment? I don't want to lose you as a friend ever! I need your happy face in my life. But with my inability to be in love with you, can we co-exist or would it be better for you if I where to just leave?