I don't think all this pain is good for me
******' up my hands punching walls.
Razor Blades to my skin
Its not good.
"A world so hateful someone would rather die then be who they are"
"A happy ending be slitting my throat"
You thought your jokes were funny
When I used to run away with tears rushing down my face, it was 'funny'
Now I stand here ready to kick the chair,
When I stop and think
"Wait"
Who needs 'em.
Bunch of insecure ******* trying to make themselves look good.
I say stay strong, **** bullies and be with people who accept you for who you are and don't give a **** what other people think.
Thank you *******.
You helped me see the light.
Long Live.

Have you any idea the **** I've been through
The feelings I harbour
My pain would ****
To you im but a shadow
Always there
Taken for granted
But always there
You will never know what I've done
What I'm all about and
There's nothing you can do to fix me
Like a broken plate
Broken heart
I'm only a person in your life if you need me
Use me
Im alone
Used
Sad
Simple
Crazy

I hate the way it curves up
Each muscle in your face aching to be released
I hate your smile
Only because I know its fake
You don't even realize it anymore
You've become so accustomed to it
Nobody can tell the mask from your real complexion
Not even your reflection
I hate your smile
When you hide the frown
I'd rather you let me try and make it real
I hate the way that bright red lipstick
Glues it into place
The way the mascara seems to stain the edges
From every midnight love attempt from your pillow
Ending only in failure when the sun reaches your window
You can't hide from me
I can see through it all
I hate your smile
Mainly because it resembles mine all to much

Its your time of the month
Its my time of the day
Somebody has to do it
So dont ask me why I'm in the shower
For 20 extra minutes

horns squawk
   rainforest avenues
  
  exoskeleton
of cars
   arteries clogged
with unlovely   taxi cabs

fat  green  fruit
for sale
     five languages
merge into a knot
hisses    kiss    vowels
   kiwis apples pears

   black guys   basketball
debt rises like      blood pressure
stocks tumble
    but we walk
brogues clop on concrete

count  brick after  brick
sun cascades
   over roof slates
mind cracks in slabs

   (you say
Monroe      stood here)

   heat quivers
men are dominoes
suits    for the office
   a funeral

designer sneakers
   daddy paid for
pigtails   cheap thrills
  violet octagons
  on a stranger’s neck
(behind the closed doors)

today
I drink purple water
     aubergine lips
remind me
of a Tuscany Superb

   list the names
Houston   Charlton
Leroy   Sullivan
Perry   Cornelia
Dominick and Jane

(ladders lead
                away from me
                close to
you)

and back again

I write your name
                              in red
   sunlight
seeps through bottles
          on a windowsill
   margarine kaleidoscopes
         on legs

naked for a change
(early summer risky business)

Floorboards yawn
     under the weight of our stories
   I take showers
        as well as baths now
   Can't be twenty-one here
older   shush you couldn't tell

   Roll my finger
   make your piano tingle
like when our wrists
    bump together
    when spines crackle
on books bought yesterday
    this city   bubbles
        all fiction

You think
monochrome
     makes you look better
     camera   snap   done
jazz sashays around the room
    head out a window
hear people as nosebleeds
                    scrabble about

You flirt
        (what a discovery)
like flowers in a vase
   orange juice   bagels
ten-plus-ten toes

     (A moment
where your eyes ache
     into mine)

I hop
stepped jumped
into this mess

     you know as well as I do
     what a delectable
mess we are in