There was an idea
I had last night
At the moment between
Consciousness and sleep sublime
An ephemeral ribbon
Of insight
That opened my heart
And my mind in parts
That had been blind.

My mind said "rise"
My body said "do you think that's wise?"

That ribbon floated on by.

"Get up write it down"
"I'll remember it word for word"
Of course that was a nasty lie.

In this morning's black darkness
It was gone It was gone
Like the moments of our lives
Floating ephemiral ribbons
Dancing in the breezes
Of  time. ..

Creativity
&
Madness
I've walked the razor's edge.
Playing it straight
In public places
No one knew
The thoughts and voices
Running around my head.
Fortune dictated
I never made it
To the walking dead.

Secret sharers
Come to me
At the beginning
And at the end
Of their plunge
Into that madness
Falling off the ledge.

No sleep came to them
Electronic insomnia
Ran them.
Cars became creatures
Screaming at them
As real as the table
Between us.

Imagination run wild
A chariot
The horses sweating
And running full speed
The reins either
Flapping untamed
Or
Imagination chained
Directed into these lines.

Creativity
&
Madness
At the razor's edge.

Disorganization
Voices screaming
When the wind is silent.
Miming up against the walls
No one can see them at all.
And in space as they said
"No one can hear you scream"
And space surrounds me.

Creativity
&
Madness

Pros & cons
Cost benefit ratios

*** makes it worse
The roots ungrounded

Crystal gears it up

Alcohol numbs the
Mind with depression's
Blanket of dread.

While ****** leaves
You strung out and lead.

The drugs they give you
Leaves you walking dead
But calm and able
To
Play it straight in public places
Far from the
Razor's edge
Of creativity & madness.

What's a poor boy to do?
Wind up sleeping in the park?
Cold wet encampment bound
Lost in the landscape
Of madness
Sights
Shadows,
A mind full
Of old echoes
Blinding.

How do we walk
This line?
A few fall over
A few are left behind.
Some never know what they could find
And some find that it all resides
At the intersection
At the razor's edge...

The sun rises
In the east.
The sun sets
In the west.
I run to and fro
And never find my rest.

Hollerdays Hollerdays
We're heading south
To
LA.

The kids are asking me
Are we there yet
I'm always telling 'em
We're always there.

The turkey's laid out
Samonella feast
A lotta pink not much meat.
My father's screaming about the right
My brother's yelling at his wife
My mother's crying in the kitchen light.
My aunt is grinding her pelvic bone
Into the back of my hand on the couch.
Uncle Paul just out of rehab is
Pouring out another one.

While my sister's distressed her third husband Fred arrived mostly undressed.
Her kid keeps sticking out
His tongue at me.

Jesse's next door
Doing a smash
And grab.

Liza's boy
Toby has come
Undone.

While you
And I dance
In the hall.
To "the road goes
On forever
And
The party never ends"

While the cousins have taken
Their fight outside
Just about the time
The cops arrive to
Warn us about Mickey
barking
In the yard.

The ****'s all gone
The bottles are done.
Kisses all around for
Each and every one.

Hollerdays Hollerdays
Same time
Next year
We hold our traditions close and dear.

I look for you
You look for me
I breath the air
You breath.

I hold you close
I feel your touch
I watch you move
I hold you dear to me.

I found you there
When my life was scared
I found you here
When my life was more than
Half over

If I could unwind the time
Knowing that you were here
I would have searched
Each and every soul to have made
You mine.

I laid him down
In a playground
Upon which he could
Never play again

My son, my friend
My sadness overwhelms me
About what might have been

And the innocence in
Those eyes and the purity
That presence designed

It lingers across time
On the inside

I mourn for you my son
I grieve for all I have become
And left you so alone

"Daddy is that you"
You called in the night
But I was no longer there.

I had laid him down
In a playground
Upon which he could
Never play again

"The world, " he said
"Had spun one way"
"Then ceased it's movement"
"And began to spin the other"

From this sorrow of
Abandonment, my son
My child, both inside
And out

I laid them both down
In a playground
Upon which he
Could never play
Again. ..

Spring dances
Alley glances
Last chances
Internal cyclones spinning

I offered you golden words
without end

You gave me elusive lies

I offered you tender trances
places where music
never stops dancing

You gave me ******* lips
thin hips
silicone ****
wide eyes
hidden thighs
A curled finger which was a
a disguise

"Yes" was in your eyes
"No" was in your mind
In the words you said
You left me blind.

I didn't come for
The mask
The make up bit

I came for you that
golden woman inside
with the loving eyes

But I didn't have the alchemy
to turn your lead into poetry.