maria: Poems

69 · Apr 2020

new

maria Apr 2020

new

i feel like i know you and we've only just met.
i want to dive in deeper,
i want to let you see the dark and sad places in me.
to let you see the bright and shiny places too.

69 · May 2020

I don’t need much

maria May 2020

I don’t need much

I don’t need sweet nothings whispered to me.
Or grand gestures and gifts.

I just need to hear three little words.
If you catch my drift.

69 · Nov 2020

fall in love with yourself

maria Nov 2020

fall in love with yourself

I see the world with such admiration and wonder. Imagine if I could save just a fraction of that love for myself?

68 · Nov 2020

Untitled

maria Nov 2020

Untitled

the words that wish to come out of my mouth
are slowly being held back by logic
my body aches wanting your kiss
it aches to feel the warmth of your hand

67 · May 2020

you told me that I was made up of star stuff

maria May 2020

you told me that I was made up of star stuff

I’m the sun that brings warmth
That makes you feel alive

But I feel nothing from that

I want to be a black hole
Unknown, unpredictable
To matter

64 · Apr 2020

I would like to hold you

maria Apr 2020

I would like to hold you

Let you hold me too
Place my hand on your cheek
Look into your eyes
Kiss you softly

And then stop there.

63 · Jun 2020

you’re on the tip of my tongue

maria Jun 2020

you’re on the tip of my tongue

and I’d rather be on the tip of yours.

62 · Oct 2020

they speak of a love that makes it hard to breathe

maria Oct 2020

they speak of a love that makes it hard to breathe

I can tell from personal experience
that type of love isn’t sustainable.
you can’t get lost in someone that deeply and still keep yourself.

61 · Aug 2020

picture a sign in the factory of my mind

maria Aug 2020

picture a sign in the factory of my mind

0 days since my feelings went away.

60 · Jun 2020

overflow

maria Jun 2020

overflow

It has been building up
I knew it would have to come out eventually
But I said too much and I see that now.

that feel when you are married and you tell you husband you have a crush on your friend and then you tell your crush that you told your husband that you have a crush on them and you just want to disappear forever now cause everything is ruined.

60 · Nov 2020

Dizzy

maria Nov 2020

Dizzy

I find myself not wanting to say goodbye.
Looking for ways to stay longer.
I can’t remember the last time I felt something just from fingers briefly touching.
I think I’d pass out if we shared anything more.

60 · Oct 2020

i miss you

maria Oct 2020

i miss you

the minute i leave you

58 · Jun 2020

Untitled

maria Jun 2020

Untitled

it hurts me to see you in pain
i want to comfort you
softly and inappropriately

57 · Jun 2020

anxiety

maria Jun 2020

anxiety

it feels like I’m stuck in fast forward
like I can’t breathe
like everything is brighter
and louder
I can’t focus
I can’t imagine a time I don’t feel this way
I don’t feel like me

56 · Apr 2020

Untitled

maria Apr 2020

Untitled

I want to get lost in something.
Forget where I am, forget how I’m supposed to be.
I want to get knocked over by waves.
I want to be drenched in the rain.
I want to feel it all but nothing at all.
I want to be insignificant.

53 · Jun 2020

Untitled

maria Jun 2020

Untitled

You told me that you wish that you felt something for anything or anyone.
I wish you’d feel everything for me.

52 · Jun 2020

...

maria Jun 2020

...

The night is quiet and I just want you to know,
I love you
Without expectations or hopes
Just that I love you

52 · Jun 2020

I wonder

maria Jun 2020

I wonder

If your pupils dilate when you see me.
If your palms get sweaty, your heart race increases.
Your smile breaks me right open.
I can’t stop staring at your mouth,
I can’t stop imagining your arms around me.

52 · Jul 2020

Church

maria Jul 2020

Church

I used to kneel in church,
Bowed my head in reverence.
I can’t convince myself to believe anymore.
I wish I could.
I wonder if I’m searching for meaning elsewhere.
Maybe in myself.
I want others to kneel with me,
Bow their heads in reverence.

48 · Jun 2020

this isn't love

maria Jun 2020

this isn't love

it's just my body releasing too much dopamine
I can't sleep after seeing you
I can't think straight
but love isn't one sided
or it shouldn't be
it's an active choice
and this doesn't feel like that
it feels like losing control

48 · Jul 2020

.

maria Jul 2020

.

You’re always telling me life is sadness
the world is hard
we are bound to suffer.

I’d like to hold and kiss you
Make it slightly better
Prove you wrong.

— The End —