I guess it's time to move on.
Because this is that
and that is this.
Without words, there's a shift.
Our disposition sways.

The sentiments and gestures
it all festers
in the small space between us
because it just doesn't
have anywhere else to go.

No matter how busy I make myself,
it's still there.
Pounding on the cage
in the back of my mind.

I never wanted to let slip
the anguish
which was breathing through my pores.
But it's there.
Emanating around me.
In the small space between us.

She is my gaping wound
And my tourniquet
An ancient god
When I need modern medicine
She is a thing I happened upon
Who stole the water from the vein
But she isn't the drought
For she is the rain
It took a death
To know of life
Set my love free
Then paid the price

I happened upon a needle
The surrounding hay praised its name
But their god pricked my finger
Now I don't bleed the same
As I once did
Some of the pieces spilled out
And there are not enough jars
In a world filled with lids

She is a song on a deaf ear
A fallen autumn leaf
She is the forest torn to shreds
To make a Christmas wreath
She is my lover and she is my killer
For I was the field and she was the tiller

Behold all that we should happen upon
For that which kills us
May also bring
All we shall know of joy.

I can taste your bones in my mouth
decadent, exhausted

you peeled my skin back
and watched me burn brighter than the skyline on fire
pierced reds pulsing pitch

I left the morning with my head on your pavement
staring into nothing

I have sent a drop of rain that you will get some time tomorrow
Two inside a paper cup just to drown away your sorrow
Another drop upon the heart that I now seek to borrow
Three more frozen with the words we kept holding to the morrow
I'll send a drop of rain for each tear that you have wept
One at a time to ease the pain of promises made but never kept
So save the water inside jars, my garden ceiling is turning gray
Each blade of grass a glass-like shard since the day I went away.

In the absence of light, she sang to me a lyric
We had both been awake, but I could barely hear it
And although she was desperate, no sound was left heard
Through her quivering lips, never uttered a word
I listened for hours, as the sun scorched the earth
Until night fell upon us and the moon came to birth
Every dream that we shared, the *** and the violence
She now carries despair and that gut-wrenching silence
Memory of her faded as time grew less relevant
And years fled in the spires of light with no end
I will never know of the things she had said
But I felt them sink into where I lay with the dead.

One night I lost sight
Of you long before I fell
Under a spell of mistrust
No longer to the right
Of your still and quiet corpse
Wishing for just a little more
More of what you’re not
What you could never be
What you refused to give
To someone like me
So I screamed aloud for what became a year
Barely making a sound
Because no one ever came near
Now whispers crash in waves of echo
And a thunder none can hear
Still not drowning out
The fear that this is not a dream
Until you wake up
You cannot see all that I've seen
In the hour that I dreamt
To find myself alone again
Still not quite sure what it all meant.