Not he/she/they but "the borderline"
The borderline imagines this elaborate fantasy to be necessary
the borderline turns to clinginess
the borderline may exhibit narcissistic symptoms
the borderline the borderline the borderline

the borderline-
a chalk marking on the sidewalk

the borderline-
trees separating territories

the borderline-
a sign stating do not cross

not me
I am human

but since I'm a 'borderline'
you wouldn't know that

would you?

September 2nd, 2016 I received my diagnoses.
Borderline Personality Disorder
Yikes....
But then it all started to make sense.

I understand myself now more than I ever have before.

But try explaining this to a friend, a lover, a family member.

"Borderline of what?"
They all ask.

Let me explain....

I am on the borderline
The borderline of love,
and of hate

I love so deeply,
I can make you feel like you're on top of the world..

But then I split.
And suddenly,
I hate you,
I hate you,
I hate you,
But don't leave me.
please don't ever leave me.

Love me,
Love me.

Leave me behind.
I'm the borderline
I can be the happiest of people.
But also the most depressing.

See when I feel happiness
I see that the sun shines brighter,
I notice the good in the little things.

When I'm happy l,
I feel invincible.

But then...
In the blink of an eye,
I split.

And suddenly,
I'm the lowest of the low.

I'm standing on that edge,
Hoping to God I have the courage to take one more step.
To end it all.

Staring down that bottle of pills,
feeling like swallowing them maybe wouldn't be so bad.

I am on the borderline...
of your best friend,
And some days,
your worst enemy.

I push you away,
I pull you too close.

The borderline of loneliness,
and never really being alone.

I am on the borderline,

The borderline of insanity.

The borderline of my sanity.

I have borderline personality disorder,

And these borders have taken over me.

Borderline

Borderline

Verse 1:
The city lights are pretty tonight
You act like you care
But in the end I’m not the one
That you really want there

And I thought you
Could be the one I waited for
But now I know

Chorus:
You’re on the borderline
Stand and watch time pass you by
You can’t choose where you stand
What I’m not or what I am
To you
So let me go and watch me
Dip below the horizon
Then call for me and
Think I’ll have forgotten
This time
Borderline

Verse 2:
I thought the world couldn’t get any darker
Until I watched your light fade out
Just when I think it’s like permanent marker
I see your glow on the edge of town

Tell me you don’t do this on purpose
Like a sick mind game
You’re back and forth on if I’m worth it
But I know every word that rhymes with your name

And I thought you
Could be the one that had it all
But now I know

Chorus

Verse 3:
You’re on the fence
You’re taking your sweet time
Give me a clear… sign
You’re borderline
(What am I to you?)

Chorus

Verse 4:
Borderline
(You don’t know where you stand)
Borderline
(You don’t know what I am to you)
Borderline
(Your hourglass is running out of sand)
I might not be the one to catch your eye
You act like you’re all mine
But in the end, in the end
You’re borderline