Sarah

Sarah Aug 2015

right now, in this moment, i cannot
breathe; the air in my lungs is endless enjambment and i have forgotten that you are the only whisper stringing my words together into singsong sorrow and
didn't i tell you about them?
girls with eyes soft like morning gold and fingertips softer still no nothing sharp enough to sink into your heart the way sadness does girls with broken words arranged so pretty into poetry girls with nothing to tremble for except all this ******* love i always told you you deserved girls choking on flower nectar down their pretty little throats girls with hearts so light and no rain to hold girls who can breathe

or maybe just girls who write words worth staying for

desperate measures now

Sarah Jul 2015

untitled

i've been thinking about how prose never comes easy am i the quiet kind of rain
with pauses
for sighing in -
between
you know i'm not the
quiet kind of anything
my matchstick fingers always find
the silence you try so
hard to hide inside
and then

and then we are flame
i can't find myself in the ashes anymore

im selfish

Sarah Jul 2015

untitled

is it so wrong to want someone to keep my pockets are empty of love and i was thinking about how your fingers would have fit but you are a far away that never drifts just a little closer i'm so tired of being the one with glassy eyes and shaking hands and no i'll let the darkness hold me tonight don't worry you never notice anyway i think i am going away you are not who i want to stay for anymore

hold me down

Sarah Jul 2015

growing pains

you are the forever i
think about when the sky
is blue like oceans i don't
dream of drowning
in; when the sun is so bright
i can feel the light trickling
in my bones every time you teach
me how to laugh again
and again until i remember

how hollow i am

flowers won't grow in the dark
even when he promises he
will stay;

i don't think of forever anymore

oh today and tomorrow

Sarah Jul 2015

somewhere

i. searching for the sun in places too
  cold to touch
  maybe this is why it

ii. hurts like freshwater blood
   spilling out of hands that quake like ocean
   waves; this sea salt
   in my veins should be close enough

iii. he is lazy summer mornings; sweet
    grass and flowers too soft to
    pluck apart on such whims
    ‘will you stay
                    remember me
                    hold me under the sun

iv. when the winter freezes over
    all the warmth i did not deserve?’

v. no;
   my fingers are too cold for
   gardens and for you
   the sun will never shine underneath
   the rainstorms and oceans have always
   belonged to little lost things and
   hearts no one could ever hold

vi. home was a pretty word
    to keep in my empty mouth for so
    long; thank you
    for giving me somewhere
    i wanted to stay

is there somewhere

Sarah Jul 2015

promise I

i am an arsonist
and how dare you toss your
own bones into the bonfire
love letters crackling into smoke and emptiness
in the air and your fingers are
aching to play with the ashes in my hair
black and numb is smeared onto
everything i want to touch; your
hands are not
even mine to hold DON’T YOU
dare make firewood out of the
flowers in your heart
all you know is the warmth of
the sun and
if it hurts,

you don’t have to watch
if you just promise me you'll
run when i set myself alight

just girls

Sarah Jun 2015

dreaming

you dream of me in
flowers and smiles
summer laughter and sea breeze
sighing in every word we whisper to
the sun sinking into the dark;
the world is so very
small

i dream of me even
smaller
a few feet underground
with nonsense etched into the stone
weighing me down;
will you leave me a little summer
pretty little flowers shivering
beneath the cold of the night and the
silence hanging in the air

don't you know
?
i never meant to leave you all alone

now give it one more time