It started off like instant fireworks
You stood in front of me like one of those classic artworks
So stunning, my heart wouldn't stop thumping

Sparks and chemistry so effortless
Witty exchanges with cleverness
Common interests and togetherness
All that was fueling my blinded eagerness

So blinded I stopped seeing the color Red
Thought they were just flags, regular flags
Picked up my sword of rationale and shattered the biased delusional shade over my eyes
I see flags, Red and lies
Walking away with my shield of pride
She is another Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde

Never thought you existed
Until the day you stood in front of me
My world turned upside down
All rationales went out the window
The window I’ve spent years to build to keep people out
You peeked through the seams no one’s ever been
You caught a glimpse of my soul no one’s ever seen
Leaving me exposed and vulnerable.  

I love your strong independent personality
as i recognize how we have finally both meet our match

I love the way our eyes suddenly met in the crowd of people
and we just intensely peered a second too long

I love the way you smile and how it just broke through my jaded heart
like a hammer shattering glasses

I love the way you are comforted
as I held you hand and weighted tears were made ok

I love the way you stood close to me
as we slightly touched, skin to skin
it’s really the only thing I could feel anymore

I want to be the touch you crave for in a cold dark night
I want to be your idea of perfect imperfections
I want to be the lighthouse to the ghost ship you are steering
I want to be everything you never thought you deserve
I want to be your champion of the dreams you dare not dream
I want to be the Bible you spend a lifetime reading,
as at every turn of a page and
every line of psalm is a layer of undiscovered passion
ready to feed your soul  
And all I really want is to hold you and not let go
cocoon you in my warmth until the moon comes up and goes back down

So let your weary guard down and I will be your guardian forever
Even though whatever we have might not even last, I want to let you know that
I would walk with you till the end of the road, the very end
for I finally know what soulmate means through the glisten in your eye

Once upon a time,
You were bound for someone’s fireplace
Ready to burn yourself to keep the cold out
Sacrificing yourself for the warmth
An admirable ambition nonetheless
But what a shame of a way to go
You were exceptional, so one of a kind
Like a buoy in the ocean
You stood out among a sea of commotion  

With no hesitation,
A craftsman decided to fight for your alternate life
Picked you up, hauled you home
Boy, what a heavy log you were
For you to truly shine
Rots needed to be axed
Botches needed to be sanded
Cracks needed to be filled
After a lifetime of love and care
Now you get to literally say
“Dinner’s on me!”

Chainsaw marks and scratches still remain
A part of who you are but no longer in pain
With new purpose and endeavor
Looking as beautiful as ever

Baby girl,
Tell me all your hopes and dreams
All your nightmares and screams
For my arms of comfort are ready to embrace
Embrace all that of you, beauty and disgrace

You showed me a picture of Eichorn
and promised me the world
The world was the peak, what a beautiful sight it was.
“A year from now we will be on top of that thing. Look at it!”
I bought my second pair of shoes today
They are brand spanking new just like yours from a year ago

A year has gone by, the peak is still there
but we are not there
You sold me dreams and hopes that I would need to fulfill alone
….or with some random hot girls!
******* it Ben!

The road winds and winds
until we lost our way back,
back to where we were.
As the clock ticks away
the image of you fades away.
You might be unforgettable
but I’m afraid my days are reducing you to a decimal.

The road winds and winds
and I’m standing here on your spot,
the spot where I picked you from the sea of climbers.
You were grooving to your playlist like I was; a rare sight.
The memory of you hanging on to those rocks, not giving up
like a stubborn chipmunk.
I knew I had to talk to you.
“Do you want chocolate milk? It makes you stronger.”
And just like that
2 walls built with earphones collided; a rare sight.

The road winds and winds
but I keep looking back,
back at that night when sand in hour glass stood still,
back at that night when the crowd was just the 2 of us just chill,
back at the time before I said what I shouldn’t have said and it went downhill.
That was me trying too hard, that was me being a ******.
I put us six feet under,
and now i will forever be in wonder.
I could have said ANYTHING, ANYTHING instead
but my ego denied your breakfast in my bed.

The road winds and winds
and all that I’m left with are the memories of
your charm
and
your calm
and the way I made you disarm.
You laughing at my cheesy rhyme,
it was as if a ray of sunburst gleamed on my crystalized heart
melting the cold away,
but most of all
I remember
the way you challenged me in the game of silly witty jest.
No one has ever kept up but you, you kept up; a rare sight.

The road winds and winds
leaving me behind phantomly blind,
phantom… because we were never anything.
I want to say please don’t go, oh please don’t go
but we both know… that’s not how it’s gonna go.
It’s easy to say *“That wasn’t me! I’m not actually like that.”
But that was me
I did that and I hated me
So now i gotta own it
Now i gotta live with it
What I did haunted me in the night
woke me up in cold sweat
and your fainting silhouette stuck on my damped chest
I took a misstep
and made a mistake
And now i feel nothing but ache

The road winds and winds*
and I don’t know the way back.

“All the other girls are target practices
for your bullseye.”