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saige Apr 2018
his name
buzzing in my hand
quit spelling myself out
swipe a tear infested screen
instead
smile once i hear him
speak
humming in my ear
warmth through the glass
poke at old windows
pan for words
as i ramble on
he laughs a little so i
copy that
feels like
fresh air, still
everything inside
is calling me names
dumb for walking and talking in
circles
why even try to explain?
hang the hell up
you've got nothing to say
for yourself
but he called me out
of that maze
for a moment
so here's my heart
plain and shamed and open
i am too lucky
to be called
his
saige Apr 2018
oh
and while you were gone
the lights went out completely
i hope they never come back
on
saige Apr 2018
those eyes have always been the only
map
through the minefield of your
mind
the rush, the feathered touch of
another brush with
"run for your life!"

(i shouldn't be so
surprised)
saige Apr 2018
once upon a time
a third of my life ago
i loved you like god

we kissed every night
we invented a secret
we kept for too long

once upon a lie
and then back around again
i'll love you like sin
strictly fiction
when your first love is a forbidden love
saige Apr 2018
twas seven twenty
on a thursday night
ma was in the ground
pa was inside
and i
was sitting crosslegged
sipping dark chardonnay
with a dead fly
in it
feeling high on fumes of
citronella candles
while the horizon
turned to rust
and huckleberry stains
and so did my feet
and the dirt smelled the same
come to think of it
but i didn't see nothing
i'd already seen it all
that's how i
broke out
of the hoosegow
that's why i'm
freer than the flies
that can't bother me
(i never saw a ****** thing)
imagination improvisation
saige Apr 2018
Your Eyelashes

once
we fought for so long
we fell alseep on
the same train bed
and once
i woke up
i couldn't
wind down
again
telly tubby bedsheets
shifted with my sighs
squirrels raced across the rooftop
scatter, slide and
scratch
at the door
because halen wanted in
but that ancient cat could wait
for i was drawn to trace
the milkweed bangs
and cheerio lips
choo-chooing there beside me
and when i did
kissing your cheek
felt like
smoothing a
butterfly band-aid
over where i
shoved you earlier
felt like
kissing a peach
no spice and shouts and
shhhh
i learned to count
past twenty that way
it'll cool off the rage
mama used to say
just take deep breaths and
count four handfuls worth of digits
so
in through my nose
out through my mouth
in the
nite-lite angel's glow
i numbered
the precious fringe
of tiny golden rainbows
archways to the world
swimming in your irises
in your dreams
and on my
fingers
i had to start
all over
each time your
eyelids
fluttered

you stirred
i learned
to call you
beautiful
in a special whispered way
beneath your
soft little arm
i tucked the lavender bunny
that had been our
tug of war

you can have it all,
buddy
just drift back to sleep
so maybe come morning
i'll know how
to count to thirty
saige Apr 2018
get me
out of here
it's light
it's loud
it's late
i'm stuck
i'm sick
i'm sorry
i don't know what to say
i want to give you everything
i don't know how you've stayed
long enough to
get me
i want you to take the best of me
i need you to make the best of me
so
get me
alone
and let me
love you
better
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