The first time I saw you
Your hands were covering your eyes
Your sunglasses weren't
Enough

Your lattice veined hands pluck
Away at chords you've
Long forgotten.
Did you sleep last night?

Have your dreams
Broken in
To your
Days?

Your tears run like
Seattle gutter water
Clearing clean paths down your
Face

It still hurts
There's still garbage in the drains
But you're this much
Cleaner

lost in well-intention,
wedding bells mentioned
everyone expected to see
anna in white.

there were nights
the possibility felt alright,
my shaky, stained hand
loosely chained to anna's.

but
anna, i'm frightened.
but
anna, i'm young.
but
anna, my love may be mostly pretend.

the days move like parades of funerals,
words sound so important but dissolve incessantly
cold grow the hands, dim go the eyes.

there was a weekend of mercy,
when i believed strength of bind,
sorrow was distant, and your
novel face filled my mind.

but
anna, i'm frightened.
but
anna, i'm young.
but
anna, my love may be mostly pretend.

Stop Being a *****
no one likes someone who whines all the time
no one wants to listen to anything you have to say
you care about what everyone has to say
you just cant stop feeling sorry for yourself
You're such a hypocrit
you dress like a different genre everyday
can't you just think for yourself?
unless you don't care what anyone thinks?
not even yourself...
just the voices in your head telling you to jump.

*******, **** what you blame me for, **** your opinion it doesn't make a difference anymore.
Our future together was never solid, only like fluid supposedly of because what I did. You weren't perfect you have a billion flaws, it was me who listened and beckoned to your call. Whoever is next in line, I hope they don't waste their time. With a controlling, manipulating, and unfaithful, ungrateful monster like you. So say what you must to get over us but from the  beginning there was no trust, only young and wild hearts in love with lust. **** us.

The SAT's are now over,
And I study as best I can,
Despite my annoying learning disability,
I can say I tried.
But now there's the ACT,
And the finals and regents,
Along with maintaining my GPA,
And dealing with endless anxiety.

I recall the feel of our bodies pressed tightly in the backseat. The freedom of letting my fingers linger over your palm and up your arm, around your neck, and adams apple. I’d always wanted to know a body, not just the unexposed places between our thighs. Because everything is forbidden. The cool feel of placing my cheek to chest. The intimacy of hearing a heart beat on a quiet night in the summer. The way it will murmur secret love and secret shame. My hands, making a map of the placement of your face, will draw along your cheekbones, high and freckled slightly, down to the lips which part and tell me to never stop. Skin stretching over muscle and bone. Timid virility. Reaching and searching for validation in my touch. This is what we give each other.

We've been apart far too long,
And I'm tired as ever,
I feel vacous and lonely,
Without our united endeavor.

The best kind of love,
Painfully hurts deep inside.

A simple jump,

like so many others.

Only this one would be defining for so many people.

She was at the very end,

nothing was worth living for.

She had made up her mind when she stepped off with her eyes closed.

But as she felt herself fall she realized

that this isn't what she wanted,

she needed to live,

to live and fix all her mistakes, say a few sorries.

There was so much she hadn't said to those that cared about her

and that she cared about.

How did she forget them right before she jumped?

But now there is nothing to hold on to but air.


It's to late.