She is afraid.
Afraid to breath life into the thoughts
that swells, boils, and
overflows the deep depths
of her mental.
The hurt,
the confusion,
the love,
all comes out as one.

Tears.
Tears fall as what she thought were
just paranoid fears, have
taken a life of there own.
Teasing and taunting,
laughing at her sorrow.
Today has her heart throbbing
but wait until tomorrow.

When she looks into the mirror,
now staring her in the face of 一
depression or truth?
She can't decide.
She stayed silent as she allowed
whoever the presence
may be to invade my mind.
Planting her seeds,
her words acted as the water
they needed to grow.
Which would be a greater loss,
heart or mind?

It seems as soon as the girl fixed her lips
to allow her heart to speak,
and express the love she possesses for him
a few days later her heart
aches for the same reason.
As she thinks of the things
she unfortunately failed to communicate.

Though she now knows it
wouldn't have made much of a difference,
his decision was clear.
And I don't know what hurt more,
knowing that the thought of begging him
to stay was not enough to save the love
she was willing to fight for or the reality of it all.

Or maybe it was realizing that
the love he had for another was the love she was beginning to grow for him.
How scary to know you love
someone more than they do you.
He may refuse to accept it,
but there's no way he would ever
truly know how pivotal of a
role he played in her life.

It was real for her.
She never had something
so complex, yet easy.
Loving him was easy —
Smooth.
As natural as taking a breath,
as effortless as the breeze.
Would even compare it
to an everlasting high.

After landing face first from
falling through cloud number nine,
the girl placed her hand over her chest
to feel nothing inside.
Covered in armor,
decorated with battle scars.

Shifting her eyes downward
to her pulsating feet,
She is standing upon my heart.
She has surrendered.
Fell to her knees waving the flag of defeat.
Carving the initials of
her heart's captor into
her skin.