Maybe you never cared,
Maybe you only did for a day.
But I guess what I'm trying to say is
I'm too busy to worry anymore.
I'm letting you go
too.

You said you wanna be good but you're begging me to come over.

I give my love fully, but it always ends up being such a waste.

how many hearts will you have to break to see what you've done?

Suddenly I want to die.
my lips are burning,
my ******* are aching,
my stomach is caving in,
my hip bones are bleeding,
my back is breaking,
and inbetween my thighs
I am crying.
I don't want to know why I feel this way,
I just know I want it to go away.

I haven't had time to think lately
my mind has been vexed by the
thoughts of him that run through me
each and every day.

I realized that one day I will
never be able to see again.
I will never see her beauty
or see my bestfriends smile.
I will also not be able to hear.
Not your voice or any others.
I will not be able to touch...
I want to feel your warmth over me
for the rest of my days, my dear.
And singing will become impossible
because I will not be alive.
Everything will be dead.
Could it be possible that
maybe I can save my mind
before I lose it again?

i believe we could just be,
but will we ever be?

why couldn't you just have told me?

and I know that as soon as she gets here, I will fall into her arms and weep.

a relationship could be a place to hide too

he said that he saw you at the game
sitting all alone
looking around and
waiting for something,
it seemed.
he said that I had walked past and
he watched you as you stared at me
as I walked by.
what were you thinking?
why won't you say a word to me?
i'm completely lost and
absolutely confused.
please, just say
something.

i'll never change, will i?

How lucky am I to be able to wake up hearing your five different alarm clocks each morning?

If our love couldn't stay, then what makes you think that your lust for him ever possibly could?

I told you everything: every single feeling and every single thought I've had since you left. From the ways I miss you to the times I tried to hate you, but as you know, they all end with me saying *"I love you".

happiness comes and goes, but misery? oh my darling, *misery always stays.

and eyes are windows to our souls, where did the desire to know yours go?

It's funny how they all say they hate you behind your back, and the next thing you know, they want to be your friend.
It's hilarious, isn't it?

You and I, we're so intimate with one another.
Not the touching kind of intimacy either...but the closeness we share.
We talk for hours on end and we never get tired of one another's voice
and we fall asleep together, because you don't want to hang up and I hate hanging up on people, so we're just stuck together.
I say, "Yeah, we fell asleep together on the phone again last night," and my friends giggle because I talk about whatever we are as if we're already one in the same, but it's just hard to separate us since we're already so intimate with one another.
I don't need to feel your touch to know that you care about me, because I can see it in your eyes while you're talking to me about your day.
I know how much you care by the way you help me with my studies and you tell me a new history fact from the top of your head every single night.
I can feel how much you care by the way you say, "I think saying 'I guess I like you' is quite an understatement now. I really like you, Rachel. I truly do."
This is the intimacy that I cherish the most, and I'll always be grateful for you and the way you show me that you care for me.

and he said, "would you rather me quench this flame or add to it?" and I couldn't help but wonder what it feels like to hunger for something more.

love seems to motivate people, i would know.
love has motivated me to let myself go.

I'll always wait for
You.

Decided that leaving would be the best for now.

I wanna forgive and forget.

"How can you love someone who hurt you so much?"

if you're my heart, i wonder what i am to you?

some words are better left unsaid, so you should probably keep your mouth shut.

My mind says not to eat, because I don't deserve it.
The scale says "good job! You've lost 6 pounds cause you weren't worth it!"
But my body says to eat, as I make food for everyone else but myself.
I think I'm going to listen to my body for once, because being in that dark place again where I always count calories and rarely eat isn't a fun place to be.

God, I am so in love with You.
I've started thanking You every night for the life I live,
because I am so happy and lucky to be who I am.
Through You I will do what You wish,
and all I wish to do is fulfill Your
plan for my life.

Thank you God, thank you so much.

it's a lot of responsibility to hold a person's heart in your hands.

"she doesn't phase me"

do you think love is really love even while it has to be hidden?

I wish you loved me as much as you love yourself.

"People's hearts are breaking and people's lives are being ruined. How is any of this right, how is any of this fair?"

They're all gone.

and I throw up because the pain is too much to bare, please spare me, please spare me.

I crave to fill your heart with my name

What happened to forever ?

maybe if i cut myself open, all of you will pour from my veins and from my dead heart.

yes i knew the date and i remembered everything about it.
i remember the streams of light that came through the window
as i cried and cried in my nephews bed, begging for you to not die.
i sobbed as you said your last "i love you" before you went under
and maybe thats why i woke up at 7 this morning with the same heaviness in my chest that i felt last year on this day and with tears rolling down my cheeks. i remember the 5 heart-wrenching messages i sent you. and i remember wishing my sister wasn't such an *******, because yes, i was crying that the girl i loved was going to have screws and rods in her back, it frightened the hell out of me because of the possibility that something could go wrong was relatively high.
i didn't know what i would do without her.
i still don't know sometimes.

there's a lot of things that don't seem to make sense to me. but you?
*you make so much sense to me that I can't even see how it'd be wrong.

you and I,
we sin,
and we love,
yet we die in
all of this
lonlieness.

It's funny
How I thought you'd
Think of me the same way.

I was wrong.

and you message me every morning with a "hello beautiful", so I pass it on to my friends, because everyone deserves to feel the way that you make me feel right now.

How happy I was to be feeling the sun on my body and y'all's laughs all around me.

Everything is just a great big
"I don't know!"
Right now.