the lady has me temporarily off the bottle
and now the pecker stands up
better.
however, things change overnight--
instead of listening to Shostakovich and
Mozart through a smeared haze of smoke
the nights change, new
complexities:
we drive to Baskin-Robbins,
31 flavors:
Rocky Road, Bubble Gum, Apricot Ice, Strawberry
Cheesecake, Chocolate Mint...

we park outside and look at icecream
people
a very healthy and satisfied people,
nary a potential suicide in sight
(they probably even vote)
and I tell her
"what if the boys saw me go in there? suppose they
find out I'm going in for a walnut peach sundae?"
"come on, chicken," she laughs and we go in
and stand with the icecream people.
none of them are cursing or threatening
the clerks.
there seem to be no hangovers or
grievances.
I am alarmed at the placid and calm wave
that flows about. I feel like a ***** in a
beauty contest. we finally get our sundaes and
sit in the car and eat them.

I must admit they are quite good. a curious new
world. (all my friends tell me I am looking
better. "you're looking good, man, we thought you
were going to die there for a while...")
--those 4,500 dark nights, the jails, the
hospitals...

and later that night
there is use for the pecker, use for
love, and it is glorious,
long and true,
and afterwards we speak of easy things;
our heads by the open window with the moonlight
looking through, we sleep in each other's
arms.

the icecream people make me feel good,
inside and out.

I caress every angle,
Every curve,
Every rise and fall,
Every swell of your unified chaos, caught,
Behind black bars,
The sonorous bass,
Like boulders rumbling beneath my feet,
Walking on the concrete,
Conducting my heartbeat,
Your resonant forte flowing through my veins,
Lighting a cold fire deep inside my chest,
Submerging my body in fluid sound,
Making my fingertips tingle,
As waves of audible emotion intertwine with my soul,
And let me feel,
But all must come to a close,
Everybody knows,
They sigh and say, "That’s just the way it goes"
Like ashes blown away on an errant wind,
You leaves me with a silence so loud, my ears ring.
But I can hear my spirit sing,
Like boulders rumbling beneath my feet,
Walking on the concrete,
Answering my heartbeat.

I had love once,
I had it in my chest,
In my forehead,
Flowing out of my fingertips.
I had love once,
Made my heart gallop sideways
To a rhythm in a symphony only we could hear.
I had love once,
I had it all the way home
When your lips
Whispered into my cheekbones,
"goodbye."
I had love once,
Once upon a time
When the glass slipper still fit my two left feet.
I was in love once,
When sweet spring breezes
Gently tucked my hair behind one ear.
I hated love once,
because while I closed my eyes,

waiting,

You plucked each puzzle piece from inside me,
And left me with a half-finished picture of what love is supposed to be.

I met a genius on the train
today
about 6 years old,
he sat beside me
and as the train
ran down along the coast
we came to the ocean
and then he looked at me
and said,
it's not pretty.

it was the first time I'd
realized
that.

the French palate doth enjoy a little horse
a batch of it hath been recognized
their meat products ill categorized
consuming countries seeking some recourse
a mix up at the meat supplier's end
hath drawn many persons to keenly question
the thoroughness of factory inspection
bovine and equine meats differ in blend
the affair hath been verily upsetting
those who didn't follow with consistency
now have a smattering of egg on face
the episode is most embarrassing
food items should guarantee authenticity
once they're on the market they cause disgrace

little dark girl with
kind eyes
when it comes time to
use the knife
I won't flinch and
i won't blame
you,
as I drive along the shore alone
as the palms wave,
the ugly heavy palms,
as the living does not arrive
as the dead do not leave,
i won't blame you,
instead
i will remember the kisses
our lips raw with love
and how you gave me
everything you had
and how I
offered you what was left of
me,
and I will remember your small room
the feel of you
the light in the window
your records
your books
our morning coffee
our noons our nights
our bodies spilled together
sleeping
the tiny flowing currents
immediate and forever
your leg my leg
your arm my arm
your smile and the warmth
of you
who made me laugh
again.
little dark girl with kind eyes
you have no
knife. the knife is
mine and i won't use it
yet.

Of Celestial Beings
and omnipotent Kings,
the poets tend to
ramble.
Triune Godhead,
If explained,
Can leave your poor wits
scrambled.
Approach Him, rather,
In a cave
in service as a
stable.
Behold Him there, the guiltless Babe,
In that setting rather odd;.
The smiling baby Jesus,
the human face of God.