When time stops,

Would you remember me like how I was at the back of your mind? Would you still remember me as a whole. Coffee brown eyes,dark snow white's hair,pink tinted cheeks,crimson red lips,eyes as pure as a baby's. Would you find me exceptional,alluring or even intriguing? Exquisite yet intoxicating.

When time stops,

Would you find me in your dreams? Would you find me at the bistro where we first met? Would you find me sitting at the corner of the room,drinking a large cup of mocha latte,with a book in my hand and a croissant on the other? Fingers creasing the corner of the book. Steam rising from the mug of the brown liquid,warming my face.

When time stops,

Would you miss me? Would you try and turn back time just to find me laughing at your jokes? A tune which you probably won't miss. A laugh that broke the thin quiet air. Would you sacrifice yourself to search for Father Time to turn back things to the way it was? Would you climb to the highest peak of the tower where heaven meets earth,open the gates of the celestial spirits,and seek for me?

Time stops.

Now,what would you do?

No matter how long I stood under that hot water
It could not beat the defeated feeling from me
If anything it only bruised me more
I stared at white porcelain and products that
No matter how long I scrubbed
Left me feeling just as clean as that grimy shower curtain
I was coming to the conclusion that this wound was more than skin deep
And I had know that before, but I wore denial as a blindfold
Because in the darkness I couldn't see that all the makeup that I pretended wasn't very much
Was doing nothing to hide the puffy red and purple eyes
Evidence of tears, too many to allow for sleep
I'm too much of an open book for makeup and clothes to make any difference
I know, they know, you know
I'm tired of the look
The look of pity that has morphed into one of exhaustion, because they are all getting bored
With my mundane heartbreaks
I don't blame them
But this isn't sadness anymore
I'm lost
I feel defeated, by myself mainly, because I can't even pretend I'm mad
I'm just lonely, and I'm tired of not knowing what to do, or how to feel
I want to let it all go and have the "fun time" they're all living
But I don't like their fun, it's too much
I'm too fragile, always so fragile
I don't want to believe it's done and the all the best things break
I don't want to forget you, the way you looked at me, acted around me,
held me close in that same shower
I'm preventing my own healing
I'm fighting myself, still
And I'm just really
Really tired

A rose stares at me
At the bedside table.
Reposed and still, it is
Withered by time,

Drizzled with tears and
Years of waiting and
Wanting for love's
Redemption.

For a moment, it recites
A poignant Villanele
Inscribed on a faded
Photograph of young

Lovers. There was a
Promise of forever,
But forever is a word
That belongs to fairy tales.

There is no fairy, only a
Tale of fair reality that even
The Sun sets in paradise...
Another rose stares at me

At the bedside table, she is
Reposed and still. Nightfall
Comes, as she leaves our
Room, darkness invades the

Horizon. The rose has ceased to
Bloom.

You pretended to care
Told me, "I will." and took me in,
Said something sweet.
You said what I want, but not what you mean.
We were seemingly so serene.
You promised me,
Not just in times of glee.
The happier we seemed to be,
The wishes, well were kept.
As soon as the wind kicked up,
You were emotionally inept.
You said I was the one.
Who knew you'd run.
I saw all your imperfections.
And lied to myself about every one.
Your lie was more,
But it was my favorite.
You'd quietly say,
"I love you too."
Because, sometimes a lie,
Is better than truth.

When it comes to you,
I'll wait.
You're eyes are bait,
But I won't bite.
I'll sit up straight.
I'll respond,
Not instigate.
I promise,
I'll wait.
I've got time.
I'll need it at this rate.

when you died
i threw your skeleton into my closet
because i couldn't let go of the boy
who told me i didn't need skinny legs
to be beautiful and that it was okay to
drink water when everyone else was
drinking beer

but your skeleton has skinnier legs
than i do and i'm left getting drunk
off old photographs and songs that
sing the words that you used to sing
to me when we sat in parking lots
on wednesday nights doing nothing but
laughing and not saying what we really
wanted to say

i like you a lot
i love you more
i hate you sometimes
please don't leave
i'm really going to miss you

i locked myself in the closet yesterday
with your skeleton
with the memories
i could hear you laugh and
things were okay
(for once)