It's an irritating itch that I cannot reach.
A nightmare that replays over and over.
This undying urge to search for love.

Addicted to the high that comes with new and possible forever,
Constantly looking under every rock, afraid that it has already passed me by.
Blind to warnings, lies or danger.
Seeking comfort, affection, admiration from a stranger.

Obsessed with this ideal, this fairy tale that becomes a drug.
Drunk off the thoughts, the memories of a love.
Drowning in solitude, I gasp for the sweet air only he can give.

Always wearing my heart and every emotion on my sleeve.
Exposed, Naked in a crowd.
So many scars cover what's left of my soul.
They bleed and reopen, still I seek something to fill this whole.
Screaming at the top of my lungs but no one around to hear.
Never truly finding it is my greatest and only fear.

She loves me, she loves me not
I cannot resist, I love her too.
Shes bad for me, so bad for me
Cant see happiness in our future, only tragedy.

Why even Try? To fall in love all over again
Watch her leave, feel my heart die.
But, every time I hear her voice, smell her perfume, touch her skin
I fall right back into that deadly trap.
Here we go again

I despise her for hurting me
Tell myself over & over
The more I hate, the harder I love
I cant wait to hold her

She is a part of me, the connecting strand to my double helix
If ever our love died, it would surely rise from the ashes, the most beautiful Phoenix.

The fire inside me burns as hot as the sun
Its best we don't get close. I warn her; leave, hide, run!!
I know she wont listen, she knows she wont listen,
We know she wont listen.

Love can be an amazing force
The power to create
The power to destroy
Passion & Pleasure
At the expense of others pain, good times we enjoy

Over & over again,
I tell myself, its possible for us to be “only” friends
She belongs to someone else
We're playing with fire
Will we burn in the end?
I give in, she gives in
The flame is ignited
Here we go again

Oh my
I know you want me
i'm such a pretty mess
a painted doll with bright green eyes
and cuts that you can mend
I bat my eyes so cutely
when i'm trying not to cry
I turn my head and you grab me
Still in poised and in my dress

and what you see's not what you get

Because i'm no prize my dear
and I fall down when I cry
because my body shakes so horribly
and i'll always ask you why
why you care about my health my mind
and why you care to look at me
when my eyes are red and swollen
and i'm trying not to bleed
My lipstick smears away
across my face and on my hands
I will push you I will fight you
ball my fists up and i'll scream
till you can't stand the thought of me
and I slump down in defeat
because i'm no doll and I don't play
i'm just a little mess
a formerly pretty girl with scars on her legs
and sweetie
scars don't mend

I am the third pair of hands when only two are needed,
The second set of ears when the first is otherwise occupied.
I am the follower in conversation,
The chimer-in of small, unimportant thoughts.
I give good advice that is rarely taken,
But never say "I told you so."
I am the one in the background, seldom noticed
*But I am always there