Your piercing eyes see right through me.
You see no one but yourself.
I will never satisfy you,
But for me, there could be no one else.

We've been through it all;
Although most has been tainted, keeping me down...
I will never leave you,
Through all the resentments and lies, I'm having a breakdown.

I don't know why I love you
I don't know why you don't even care
Even when I thought about leaving you
Consequences too extreme to dare

The best times of my life are over now
I, finally, let you have control over me.
I should have left the night you first hit me
I'm sick and twisted, being alone seemed worst agony.

I made up excuses for you...
My real friends knew all along
They begged me to leave you,
Your constant abuse made me think I wasn't strong.

Now, I've given up on this existence.
I feel hopeless and so alone
Doesn't matter why I still feel love for you.
Almost dying has given me a new backbone.

Your piercing eyes always stared right through me
Blinded by everything else, only yourself to see
I could never satisfy you.
Now I'm putting my energy into something worthwhile....

.... ME!!

MY GARDEN

On a cold winter's day,
I see a reflection of me.
Tears envelop my eyes
When I think of how it used to be....

Days of yesterday seem to float away
The clouds intumescent symbols fill the expanse of the sky
I don't know the solution
I have no reasons why

The roses in my garden-
Have died and wilted away.
I have nothing left in ny little rose garden...
Sorrow and regret, pain of the past, need to live in today.

Gasping for a breath of fresh air without suffocating,
Drowning in so many tears, so much misery and pain..
The dreams I once had, are nightmares and its hard to close my eyes.

I just sit back and listen
To the laughter behind my back
I was too naive to see the lies,
And now I think I feel them coming back.

Bring to me an inner peace,
Where I can find the right way,
I don't feel the changes taking place.
But, I'll say it anyway.

The wind will murmur gossip,
And if you listen carefully...
The love and peace you feel right now...
Vaporizes into nothing, vanishing into eternity.

Pain is.....
Pain is knowing that your feelings aren't returned.
Pain is your love blazing with fire until its burnt.
Pain is the emotion that not many will admit to.
Pain is feeling that can your whole being has been broken in two.

Fear is....
Fear is wondering when the end will come.
Fear is knowing there is more to be done
Fear is a nightmare with no way to wake up
Fear is the fantasy and the reality, thereof

Peace is....
Peace is serenity always at hand.
Peace is the harmony that could be throughout the land.
Peace is a slow, rhythmic beat dancing in the rain.
Peace is something we are yet to gain.

Sometimes I wonder...
If what you say is really true.
All you say time and time again
...Is I love you.

Said once or twice, the meaning is real
But I never knew you lost the ability to feel.
I used to wait in longing to hear you say
Those very words of encouragement and commitment...

Now as they come from your deceitful lips
All i feel is remorse, regret and resentment.
It seems as though, these are just words to you
Conjured up with a heart of stone, disguised in truth.

Have absolutely no meaning,
just simple words to you..
I'm blinded by love and I'm naive
So your lies will satisfy me

I admit that this was once the way to make me stay
I realize, now, this is the coward's way
Promises that once you made and those you will-
Your promises mean nothing, only to keep me with you still.

Sometimes, I wonder as I sit here alone,
If what you say is really true
All you say, time and time again
Makes me wonder why I ever loved you.

The parting of the oceans,
The beating of my restless heart..
Tis all the same in God's eyes, I think.
Another beautiful miracle that no one can explain..

Yet, there will be more..

The afterlife is like a soft breeze
Breathing soft drops of rain on a warm summer's day
No one wants to leave, but the time is up and they must.

... It will all begin again soon.