(Follow my cue)
(I’ll tell you when you speed it up)
(Then when to read me slow)

(Fast)
I laugh at the idea of love
this sentimental feeling we urge to
convince us that we’re not just little ants
scattering over mother earth’s back

(Faster)
As if we’re trying to convince our
frightened youth within
that there’s a happier ending
to this tragedy we’re all casted in

(FASTER)
CAST
your fears to the wind
as your eyes run out of breath
keeping up my my poetic prose
my repetition is your oblivion,
and you’ll see that we are in fact
ants
alone

(Faster)
scattering down her spine
she doesn’t even squirm
Giggles at our insignificance
we are alone

(Just Fast)
Isn’t that the truth behind
it all
that we’re alone
that eventually we’ll
fall into an eternal rest
sleep
death

(Slow it down for me )
I am the child of the most HIGH
why should I fear loneliness?
He is no kin of mind
Isn’t my present a gift
within myself
I don’t need more!

(Slower)*
I don’t need my hands to wrinkle
entwined with another?
don’t need to run them
through the silver hair of my lover?
Why should an earthly Love be a goal of min(d/e)?

If my love was personified as my hustle
I’d take you into my heart and never let you go.
I’d cling tight onto you  and no matter how hard you fought
I wouldn’t let go
I’d let you know
You. Are. mine
No one elses
Your home is hear
Listen
to the beat reverberating through my chest
Cavity
Rotting me from the inside
You’d make me blind
Like an error  
my mind
I wouldn’t understand how you infiltrated my veins
I’d kiss you like you were my forever
Love you in pure desperation
Because my present without you is bleak
At best I know that if I blink
the moment could pass
A risk I can’t take
Won’t
Never
Losing wouldn’t be an option
You would be my dream
you
the very earth that I walk on
The pillow I lay down on
I’d lay down
What  ever I would have to
To make you my reality
I would blindly dive into the opportunity
to make my dreams come true
THEY wouldn’t deter me
I don’t need  their
approval
permission
opinion
Not to love you
Because the core of me would want you
And the lack of THEM understanding my vision
Means that I’m about to make history
If my love was my hustle
We’d never end
You would be my dreams
And without you I would be nothing

Take what you need and go
And let me be the blame
Don’t tip toe
Please run
I will hide the pain

Take What you Need and Go
And Let my fire hiss
Let it remain All that I own
What you will soon miss

Don’t peak over your shoulder
I never called your name
Just keep moving forward
As if you never came

Let the present wisp
To past
Draw the future nearer
Let me be a distant memory
A mistake
You now see clearer

Take what you need and go
As always I’ll be here
Don’t cry for me
Don’t look back
You will never see my tears

Let me wash across your back
Remove every burden and stain
Let my love lift you to your feet
Let my kiss remove your pain

Let me salvage your sanity
Let me return to you your pride
Let me reconstruct a broken soul
And return vision to your eyes

Come let me be a pillar
Until you have the strength to fight
Then do as
You always do
And toss me to the side

Take what you need and go
Leave me here
Just I
Let me be a bitter memory
In the present I do not reside

An unpleasant thought,  a blemish where
Your vulnerability could not subside
Let me be that moment
You bury deep inside

I know now the truth is
you were never mine
Just one of many
who crossed my path
And used my heart to hide

Just Take What you Need Please
Shameful truth lay in my eyes
How you used WE
to construct a place
better for only I

Take What you need and go
You will see no pain
I will continue to walk my path
Bearing the burden of a woman’s shame

Silence
No brilliance
not a sound
not even my heart pounds
I  hear only what I've done
The past
Regrets
They echo in my ear mockingly

As the darkness encompasses me
I'm alone
I feel a truth run down my bone
and I know
my time has come
this fight is done
and I lay down in defeat
my most precious commodity

And Wait

Unaware of a lover turned thief
in my chest it once remained
now given away
my fingers numb, cold in pain
I wait for him to do the same

I wait

My heart no longer mine
I am but a shell of myself
empty
and with time
bitterness sweeps
I feel naked

Yet Still I wait

As I realize he will not do the same
my sacrifice in vein
selfishness to greed
he denies me what I need
still a flicker of hope
for a better fate

I wait

In silence
not a sound
not even my heart pounds
I hear only what I've done
the past
my most recent mistakes
punishes me
with this hopeless
Wait

I am the wind along your cheeks
resurrecting
bitter droplets
to glaze
an endless white sea
surrounding
dark brown abyss
covered only fleetingly
by the continued
parting of lips
whose lashes
strike rapidly
in an effort to
delicately
cease
weakness from
reverberating on  your cheeks
Does not the brow secrete
pain?
Is not your agony
flourishing?
Cast my words to the breeze
truth lands heavily on your shattered spirit
I am the wind
that made thee weep
forgive me

The Common deception?
False sense of protection?
No.
An admiration of…

The little things
Joy creasing your skin
The way our day begins
Your melanin

I could find
A million excuses why
Why this could never last
Why my heart won't let this pass

But not one has
Any equivalence
Despite
My ambivalence

To the feeling
I have
When I'm
With you

Monè
@_heyMone

I never read what I write
While I'm writing
Because I write from the soul
Which rarely has patience for the limited comprehension of my mind

I felt Life take a hard right
looked out the window
and saw a sign
'WELCOME TO ROCK BOTTOM"
in dim lights
found myself in the dirt
face down to the earth
waiting for someone to tell me my worth
paralyzed
I tried
effortlessly to rise
but it felt like my demise
was so heavy that
I couldn't arise
from that place

Coupled by
darkness in my soul
I saw my story unfold
and it made me want to
release a clip into my brain
or what remained
because clearly I was insane
for allowing my pain to
keep me off my feet
And now as I weep
I wait
hoping that every intake of breath
is my last.

I never read what I write
while I'm writing
because I write from the soul
which rarely has patience for the limited comprehension of my mind
and in my mind
I reached my end in Rock Bottom
I calculated
0% chance of success
even at my best
my demeanor was too shattered
to unearth
any type of power
a little voice
welcomed me to my final hour
It dug a grave for my soul
wrote my will in the earth
and asked me to sign

But I never read what I wrote
because my soul finally spoke
assuring me that
this hour
was mine

Though I still couldn't stand
I pushed up with my hands
knelt in the sand
at Rock Bottom
and though I still couldn't lift my head
I saw it bow instead
hand clasped
time passed
I waited
there at Rock Bottom

I never read what I write
While I'm writing
because I write from the soul
and right from the soul
I saw the limited comprehension of my mind
which could only see
Rock Bottom as my final resting space

When it was in fact my birth place
where I would take
every pain and tear
not to be cast away
but kept safe
a reminder of what I can take

or rather
what He can make
grow from the corners of despair
for repair
Rock bottom
was the most
painful
loving
dark
illuminating
crippling
strengthening
chapter in my life

But I learned so much about his might
that all I could do right
is write this
beautiful
tale in Rock Bottom

As I read what I write
at a time in my life
where my might
appeared broken
know you
are chosen
by his grace may you face
Rock Bottom
because with time
he will take you
to peace
and shape you too
his will
a blessing that is both yours and mine

You will find your
most powerful enemy
may dwell
above the brow
below the crown
Mind
who cannot see the finish line
because its limited comprehension
resides
only in the calculated present
which compared to
a prayerful soul
is always 3 steps behind

So I never read what
I wrote
until now
because my soul
found
strength
wisdom
and courage
knelt
in the sand with praying
hands

through mental abyss
from which
I arose
forgiveness in tow
a story to be told
thank God
I died in Rock Bottom