vulnerability is the worst emotion
time after time you try to leave your shell
practicing some type of
self promotion
telling others you really need to
work on what you say
oh how they encourage you without delay
“but you're amazing you shouldn't hide”
“you are not alone”
“you can't just avoid everyone all your life”
my only fear isn’t just everybody else
vulnerability has this way of
taking hold of your tongue
regretting every word you speak
and don’t speak
your worst enemy becomes yourself
makes me want to scream in frustration
I know I can be something amazing
I want to run forward without
looking back ever again
I try to so hard to force these
sentences out of me
to keep some hope about
being accepted as just who I am
some days no matter what I try
I must accept defeat
maybe instead of using
words this time
I'll use something like
a double-edged knife
I'll slit my stomach open and
spill all that i’ve kept inside
would that be enough
would people understand me then
because as of now whenever
I use my head
they never seem to quite get it
people they always shoot
me down without a use of
even a reply
with my whole self laid out
on the ground they surely
should understand all that I am
and plus I read this was
an honorable way to die