I need to get closer to God.

Words I say everyday, but still I walk around with the same feeling of humility.

I feel like God looks down upon me, as I have failed to honor his one wish of worship.
Sometimes I wonder why don't I have the discipline of those who reach out to him everyday..
Is there something I lack?
I care, I know I do..but why doesn't it show..why does my heart ache to become one with God but it always feels like I can't reach him or as if it's too late. Like I can't live my life and be happy without displeasing him or not being happy myself
But...
Tomorrow I will get closer to God.