I want someone to comfort me. But i want to drive people away. I want someone to hug me and tell me everything is going to be fine. But I hate it when someone does it to me. I always said to myself,"pull your **** together ****" I end up opening my own scars. Its me,its my fault. I ruin everything. Everything fragile,I broke. Never again will it be the same. I hate myself for craving for the attention not necessary. Also,i hate myself for never being good enough. I know i don't have to be. But things are easier said than done. Its always been me who gets to give the last part of my heart. But never gets to taste what it is to be truly happy. People are so loved. I stand isolated in that very corner. Looking at that very moment. Seeing the spark, the light the ignited passion to love someone. Who come? I look everywhere to find my happiness But I know it isn't anywhere Its within me. Somewhere waiting to be triggered. What if no one comes? No one ignites me. Will I ever? I'm too tired to do anything. I want to disappear. No one won't notice. I know I am loved. I forget. I get the feeling that I ruin stuff so precious I'm not and never will be good enough.