I just feel really guilty. I feel really sad. I feel really pointless. And when I used to get upset I just wanted someone to hold me And comfort me.
Now I don't want that. I don't want to be tragic. I don't want to be anything.
I finally feel again. And everything is so temporary.
Do you know what my mother Told me the other day while I was at her house? She thinks the apocalypse is coming. My mother is logical and wise And smart and has never once Said anything of the sort.
And she was completely serious.
And I'm not saying I believe her. Because I don't, We all have our own beliefs, And I really respect that. Mine aren't solid, but mostly scientific.
But that is not the point.
The point is that nothing is solid. Everything is changing and temporary. But change isn't a constant. Don't ever let anybody tell you that. Somethings always change, Somethings never will.
Everything is a great big mess. I am a great big mess. And this is my ramblings.
I think my cat is dying. For this reason alone, I'm feeling increasingly guilty about leaving home.