i never got to try
all those good things
like the taste of coffee in 3am
(because i'm sure it's different than the one in 7)
and waking up well rested;
like losing myself and that meaning something nice
and being proud of myself;
like being good at my favourite activities
and screaming at the top of my lungs
on the roof of an abandoned building;
like drawing silly things
and singing along to lyrics that don't make any sense;
like being strong enough
and saving myself
i never got to be fine,
so i don't know how to keep going