On a night like any other,
I went outside to have a smoke
I saw a gecko on a tree
and to my surprise, it spoke!

Tsk, tsk, tsk
the lizard said
Its haunting disapproval
followed me to bed

The next evening, I came back
to see what its problem was
I asked, "You disagree with cigarettes?
I'll quit the habit, if I must!"

Tsk, tsk, tsk
the lizard said
I can't be certain, but I'd bet
it was shaking its little head

The following night, I returned
to again face cold-blooded judgment
I lamented, "Why do you torment me so,
without reason, with no argument?"

Tsk, tsk, tsk
the lizard went
By that time, my patience
was utterly spent

On our last meeting, I carried with me
a pair of scissors and ****** on my mind
As I approached the gecko with sharp intent,
suddenly the tail detached from its behind!

Tsk, tsk, tsk
the lizard mocked me as it left
Moonlight creatures claim another victim
Of my dignity, I am bereft