I'm filled up to the brim again.
Mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually
although they may end that way,
these things have not felt like an ally to me.
For as long as I've been awake, they cause a flurry
of mental puking, physical fatigue, emotional suicide,
and spiritual confusion.
It's one of those nights where sleeping
would be as pointless as waking up.
True, I could pass the time by going for a walk.
but it would just end with me
sitting next to the road saying, "Just a few steps.
It shouldn't hurt for long..."
I can attempt to explain everything
but I simply grow dizzier and my stomach twists
When I kissed you again,
with a year and a half of not speaking behind us,
My lungs simply shut and my heart sank into my stomach.
It was a long day, but it was the best day I've had in a long time.
I'm sure I know you.
You always seemed a lot like me.
We both had out fears.
It felt like it was you and I against the world
But now it feels like you're a part of the world
Yes it does bother me, But I can't tell you how to live your life.
And if they ask, just tell your friends,
"He's an over-thinking, depressed, **** who's losing everything he was hoping he would still have."
Knowing that it's you is different.
It shouldn't bother me as much as it does.
You shouldn't worry about me, you shouldn't be sorry either
I'll just save the words for when you come down.
Go out with your friends, it is Friday after all.
It took everything I had to keep from screaming.
But then they would know for sure.
I'd rather have a true reason to be depressed
rather than just saying "I don't know" when someone asks
I'm not sure if the spiders are keeping me awake
or it's the lack of an "off" button on my mind.
I can't remember exactly what I dreamed of
but I can tell that it was a nightmare.

Sorry I can tell I got off track there
If no one is going to help, just give me enough to numb me
for the rest of summer