For some reason
I thought you were mine again.
That those words
Spilled out of my mouth
Never happened.
That,
For some reason,
At the end of the night,
I could call you mine
I could rest easy in your arms.
I found myself wondering
What your lips felt like,
How they would taste
If you kissed me right now.
I couldn't stop thinking
About your hands on my waist
Spinning around that small dance floor
Like it was just the two of us.
And,
For some reason,
For a split second,
I let myself believe it.
I felt a happiness that couldn't be described,
It filled me to the brim, yellow, like the sun.
I turned and smiled at you,
But thank goodness,
You didn't see me.
At that moment,
My heart broke all over again
And all I wanted to do
Was scream.
Cry out in frustration
“Why do I feel this way?
Why can’t I let him go?”
It must be the very thing I wanted to avoid,
My greatest fear:
*Love.