"I want to throw my head back
dig my nails into your skin
and ride you like a rodeo
while taking swigs of gin"

You say in no uncertain terms
"I'm much too old for that
these dishes still need washing
and I have to feed the cat"

"Lets tear each others clothes off
paint our bodies with delight
and crumple up our fresh washed sheets
let passion burn the night"

You look at me like I've gone mad
and say "that's not for me"
"I need to put the bins out and
  there's football on tv"

So I dress in finest flimsies
in the hope of causing thrills
you tell me "put a sweater on, it's cold, you'll catch a chill"

You see I like loud and rowdy
and he likes slow and sound
I haven't got much time for that
We're too long in the ground.
Now I've given up completely
don't know what to try or say
so our missionary marriage
lives to see another day.