it's been an awfully long time...
i'm sitting in the wierdest position on my school bleachers.
i refused to do gym because i feel like **** and i can't stand the way you try to get a glimpse of my bare skin.
if i was dying right in front of you, you'd ask me what was wrong instead of taking care of me.
i love the silence between songs.
i don't write on the lines because i want all of my words to be between them.
when i very sad i only notice it afterwards as i survey all of the damage that has been done.
i haven't stopped shaking and i'm surprised i haven't started an earthquake but these tremors seem to only be native to my planet.
my doctor has managed to fit my entire being onto three pieces of paper.
scares me to death.
constantly i switch the song i'm listening to because i'm trying to feel one thousand things at once.
i'm glad that you met me in the winter because things just go uphill from here so you won't be disappointed.
although i can't say that they won't get worse again in the next winter.
even if you're here,
even though winter is my favourite season,
even though the snow cools down my fevered skin,
even though even though even though it's ******* winter and these ******* pills are supposed to make me ******* happy.