they say love yourself
and accept the things that make you
who you are

they make it sound as simple as
plucking flowers
and tearing its petals off
one by one
hate or love?

but what will i do,
if i cannot love myself?

oh, but you're pretty,
you're skinny enough,
you get good grades
as if this justify that i
cannot be sad and have a
"good" life in the eyes of society?

you have never been in my own skin
it reeks of hatred and sadness
as if our bones are filled with sorrow
and broken promises of tomorrow

sometimes i get sad over stupid things
but maybe because i bottled up all my feelings
i replay memories non-stop
and this is an addiction of mine
i get drunk on the idea of love
but i push people away
then wonder why they always leave

so i hated myself
more and more
until there's nothing left
for me to hate but
my beating heart