Today I thought, for the first time
in a while of apologizing
for my existence, and asking you to deal
with my own troubles.
Again.
Slightly shocked, I looked at myself, asking
how a person such as me has not thought
of a apologizing for her very being
in so long, and how you
have convinced me you truly want
to shoulder my burdens-
Yet again.
Slightly uneasy and in awe, I
trembled, asking the air, the
room, the world, the silence (but never
myself) if
maybe I truly am
enough for you, or if
I have convinced myself to forget
that I could never be, and so
cannot remember all the thousands
of unspoken apologies I am doomed to know
need saying to you and everyone
Again and again and again.