say my name, say my name!  

you are…

you’re ******* right I am
  
I am the chemo coursing
through your blood  
pumping you full of hope  
deluding you with life’s beguiling bargain  
that pain and suffering will allow you to live
forever, if you ask nicely, and
the background music is right
  
I am the one who walks
away from the inferno  
while other souls sizzle  
their biographies written in flames
flicked to life by my match  

I am the nobody in the room
when you die alone, without the drip of morphine
your terrified eyes searching the stillness  
for a childhood vision,
hoping it will be a summer song
rather than winter’s dead bone

I am all you dreaded
all you dreamed, you
have always known me  
and followed my tracks
refusing to see me
though I was only

you