The water is unclear
As I sink at the bottom.
It feels like I'm never getting out of here
It feels like I've already hit rock bottom.

They assume that I am doing alright.
Maybe it's a curse to look okay.
When everything doesn't feel right.
Nothing seems to go my way.

Why do I have to be strong?
I carry the world on my shoulders.
It feels like moving forward is wrong.
How can I discard these heavy boulders?

Do they even see the scars on my back.
The white feathers of the wings I once carried,
are now tattered and wacked.
Breathing feels like torture, will death and I ever get married?

Let me sink down deeper in this murky water.
Oxygen laces with poison as I inhale sharper.
Did I bleed and ripped for nothing?
Should I just turn back and leave everything?


- N.V. 🥀