you were my forever once
until you ripped it from my hands
and gave it to someone else

now even joy has your fingerprints on it

i am loved again
by someone who deserves me

but when they say marriage
i hear your voice not theirs

my body remembers
what my mind begs to forget

i want to say yes
without thinking of you

i want to wear white
without feeling like a ghost inside it

how do i love someone new
with a heart you made afraid of love itself

i know you do not deserve this power

but trauma is not about who deserves what
it is about what remains after the fire