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badwords
Poems
Apr 16
Free Milk
You read my poem,
sighed like a widowed cello,
told me I was
so brave.
So sensitive.
So real.
I said thanks.
You asked if I was free
Friday.
You wanted to know the man
behind the wound.
The author of ache.
The architect of
vibes.
So I showed up.
A little unwashed.
A little twitchy.
A patchwork of trauma
in ill-fitting pants.
You blinked.
Twice.
Like I’d just tracked in mud
on the white carpet
of your curated suffering.
You wanted a candlelit meal
with my metaphors.
But I brought the cow.
It shat on the floor.
I tried to explain—
the sadness isn’t a costume.
The pain isn’t prose.
The blood on the page
was mine.
You said,
“I just thought you'd be more… together?”
I said,
“I thought you knew what empathy meant.”
Turns out,
what you really wanted
was artisanal anguish
with the trauma locally sourced
but ethically removed.
You can cry to the soundtrack—
just don’t ask where the violins came from.
Because—
Nobody is amused with a stray cow.
But most people enjoy
a good hamburger.
A bit of cheeky fun and levity.
#humor
#fun
#tropes
#tragicartist
#goodhamburgers
Written by
badwords
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