i used to remember your laugh like it was yesterday
so visceral and clear
it hurt so much to know what I had lost

now your laugh is a memory of a memory
distorting the harder I try to recall
shouldn’t it hurt less—
to forget what I once held dear?

the suffocating sorrow of a clear memory
and
the desperate grasping at the light i thought would never fade

only a laugh so lovely, could cause this kind of pain