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15h
YOU
I wanna die, wanna quit, won’t you stop at my limit?
Tough it up, stick it out, take a hit and cower down
Wanna drown, wanna sink, mind’s so foggy I can’t think
I lie and steal and sneak and fake, and worst of all,  I manipulate
I’m just like you, can’t you see? I’m everything you wished for me
Make you happy? Make you proud? I couldn’t do it, kick me out
I can’t stay, but I can’t leave, I just can’t seem to get away
Flip the script, turn the tables, happy endings are just for fables
Not good enough, ask me why? It's not because I don’t ******* try
You tell me to change yet I stay the same, you try to guilt me, cause me shame
When I scream, the sound is gone, because no one seems to catch on
I’m shaking, burning, my life in flames, I feel like ruining me is your aim
Between my knees, my head hangs low, the weight of the trauma you bestow
When I cry, you see red, your blindness to it left unsaid
I scream, I shake, I shout out loud, but your yelling always drowns me out
In my mind, I beg you to listen, but I cannot talk without opposition
In your eyes, there's no recognition, it forces me to start demolition
Destroying my body, my mind, my soul, my sense of worth long gone in a hole
When you speak, I dully obey, but never enough, to my dismay
I’m the bad one, sneaky, conniving, dying while everyone else is thriving
Lying awake, in my bed, just to make sure there’s nothing said
If I close my eyes, I’ll wake too fast, and nothing else will take me back
To my sleep, where I’m peaceful at last
You walk past, what have I become? waiting for a blow that’s bound to come
I sink, I drown, I gasp for breath, reaching for all that I have left
Right behind me, there's a Past, one that wasn’t meant to come back
When I leave, I’ll be the Past, the one that’s not ever coming back
You’ll moan and gripe and whine and complain, but I tell you, it's all in vain
Am I meant to read your mind? What you want is never clearly outlined
You love the ones close to you, but you don’t see anything wrong with what you do
When you’re happy, times are good; we laugh and smile, all is well
The sun will shine, the birds will sing, and for a moment, we’ll forget the sting
Written by
Grace Miridian  16/F/USA
(16/F/USA)   
20
 
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