Shopping's not what it used to be
I never see buy one get one free
it's all about me, me and did you see
the Christmas Range?
it's like the High flamin' Chaparral
cowboys, everywhere you look.

yes, me, me underneath the polystyrene Christmas Tree,
take a selfie with the fairy on top
She says that I have to stop and that I'm only out here
to shop.

What the..? Oh,
I get it
you mean the fairy on top bit?
I tell her that 'it's just fun, ducks'
She
gives me another one of those looks

shopping's not what it used to be.