i want to hug strangers on the bus. i want to cry on their shoulder, tell them

can you believe? how do i do this again?

let them stare at me in surprise and pity, marvel at how hard my life is

maybe somebody will know. they'll say

you've did it time and time over. it happened time and time again. you're still alive and you still will be

and i will be comforted

and I won't think at what cost, at what cost. why me again and again.
I'll know my strength and won't wonder why it isn't someone else's that's tested