I realized something about myself,
That wasn't what it seemed to be.
I can weather any circumstance,
I'll make it through and be just fine,
No matter what.
And I found such relief in that moment -
Assurance, solace, peace.
Then more time passed, and passed, and passed,
And now I can only laugh and grit my teeth
Thinking back on my own naivety.
Because now I know what it really means,
I will never see the end - never see the light.
I'll just carry on and on and on,
And it builds up inside, so quickly
Too quickly.
And it's so fucking heavy, actually
And I am just so fucking tired
Of all this goddamn trudging.