years, I thought I wasn't destined to love.
naivety really, for I was so young.
but I had just never felt something quite that strong.
fake love, sure.
affection, obsession, nothing more.
maybe I fooled myself into thinking I loved,
merely swept my doubts and grievances under the rug.

now that I'm really falling in love,
I can understand.
a feeling so gentle and yet like quicksand.

I feel myself sinking deeper
and yet wanting to be swallowed,
to lie in his arms forever
the day never to reach tomorrow.

it's frightening really,
"my first love"
the stories of heartbreak you hear from everyone else.

I may not find the courage to tell him.
to wrap my arms around him and confess.
to lay my heard out on his chest.

completely vulnerable