I think back to the days
when I would come over
for play dates
and we would
explore the world
being adventurous
energetically carefree.

It was simple
how our friendship worked
no tall tales behind
each others backs
no feelings were hurt
no secrets
no lies
no whispering.

We were all best friends
hanging out together.
A group formed quickly
and divided even quicker.

Stories embellished
to promote one’s own
popularity, creating
laughs and turning me
into the black sheep.

I learned not to trust
any of you.
Skepticism became my
new best friend.

The best thing I thought
was to leave it all
forget everyone and
begin somewhere else new.

That place didn’t really
seem quite for me either.
So I returned. Some
accepted me back with
open arms, but I still
couldn’t trust it.
I didn’t know who any
of you were anymore.
I struggled opening up
and accepting you all.

I wish I could have done it.
I wish we did reunite.
I have forever wanted to
be back in the group.

But the group is not for me.
It never was. It never will be.