I look around
And I wonder
How did I make it here
To a life I seem to be happy in
To a life I haven’t thought of leaving in so long
A life I wouldn’t want to leave
A me, I love
I remember how it use to be
And fear fills me
Insatiable hunger for more
Fills me
Every open space tingles
Feeling as though I am not doing enough
Feeling as though I am lost
I walk to his door
And for a moment
I wonder what am I doing?
Who am I?
Who have I become?
Would I recognize myself?
I call out to her-
And she smiles and nods at me.
I think you continue to walk
Maybe never knowing
And maybe they just say they know
But I don’t feel the dirt under my nails
I don’t feel the ache in the back of my throat
I don’t feel the passion burning and escaping and filling the room
I don’t feel the warmth on my hands
I feel the weight
Heavy on my heart-yet somehow basked in peace
And I do not know which path to take
So I will continue to live with the uncertainty
Until I feel
Feel it all