I wish you live happily. I've no anger or hatred towards you. And I hope I do stop bugging you.

Idk if this is your way of helping me get my closure, but it is honestly more difficult than I had imagined it to be. You've been so indifferent to my "I love you", would a single "thank you" had hurt you? Would it still hurt you to just randomly acknowledge them someday?

You'll not believe me if I were to tell you that each of the time that I've spent with you is engrained and it pops up as a happy memory... My brain has started to uncover memories from back in school - in depths I never knew I had lived back then... But at the same time, I'm also living a hard-to-get-on terms kinda realisation yet again, your love interest was not me and shall never be me.

I'll pray for you and whoever you choose to be with. May you live long happy and healthy lives in ways you both dream and then deem fit.

I just hope to have some strength within me to be able to repress these emotions again... In tired of them resurfacing over and over again, when we aren't meant to be why can't they just be done with?

I'm nobody to complain but it does pain to imagine that he had time for people but me... I just don't matter to him.. I regret that you can't even be honest with me that it took you soo long to just turn me down... I wonder if I am so bad as a person that you decided to leave me hanging? I also wonder if I have ever done so much harm that i just end up hurt over and over again... But it would be good if I don't jinx anyone's life.. I don't know why do you say I'm a good person, it took SB 5 years of relationship and 9 years of knowing me to conclude that I'm a very bad and manipulative person. I do not know what eyes you see me thru.. but thank you.. even though I do not relate with your interpretation, but from the bottom of my heart I really appreciate your effort at trying to see me as a person than as a body.

I love you, and i always will.