step step step
into this ethereal wonderland
with a guiding hand
step     step     s t e p
but alas, i have fallen and there is no branch to help me up.
where have you gone, strong tree?
where are you? i still have pieces of your bark wedged beneath my fingernails.
what have you done, gorgeous creature, to feel so ashamed?
there is moss growing on my skin from the places you touched me.
i fear my mind will water it all. i fear i'll soon turn green, darling tree.
but where have you gone to, you lovely giant?
i was so used to leaning against your cold, dark body. scratching at your fault lines.
please come back, kind heart. i miss the bruises i'd get climbing you.
you were rough to me. you were so gentle.
i liked the way your leaves gently brushed against my naked skin, raising goosebumps along my thighs. i liked the way that same pale skin got rubbed by your bark and scratched up.
adrenaline pounding through my heart as i'd get higher and higher.
come back, you stupid, beautiful tree. my only stability.

at night before i fall asleep, i feel you touching me
and everything inside me starts to burn.