He always wanted to change the outcome. No say or control just saying be better next time the moment passed. The bounce back took a while hard to shake these hard feelings rough emotions questioning what is wrong and where did it all go wrong. If he was able to pin point that moment be able to let go let loose. His mind was his safe space but sometimes an escape room with looping thoughts with no hints on how to exit within a timely manner.
So many questions but not enough answers that matched what was being said.