"There is no greater need than a hurt person's need for more hurt"
I spent hundreds of nights crying to a God I believed didn't love me
I was so sure my miracle of being born was a mistake God made
But God doesn't make mistakes
And so I spent hundreds of nights crying to a God who owed me nothing
I owed no one anything and they owe me nothing
then He made me feel as if I owed him my entire being
He was a monster in the making
He was a boy who was raised that way
He was a tormentor
I spent hours crying to a God to take away my debt to him
It took me two years to realize I owed him nothing
He picked me apart piece by piece
He made me feel like I was sick
He had felt like the cure to the poison I created
It took me two years to realize I was poisoned by everyone who ever cared about me
I poisoned him right back though
He was sick and so was I
We needed help but knew we wouldn't ask
We were two people poisoning each other with our sickness

We owe each other nothing
I was broken and begging for help
He made me feel as if I were dramatic
Attention seeking
Fine
He made me so angry I forgot what it was like to be sad
I operated under the impression I was less
I was unlovable
Because no one in my life had told me otherwise

We owe nothing to each other
I owe my love to no one
I do not deserve or earn love
People give love freely
And so do I